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  1. #51
    Forum Member

    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    I was given that advice long before the movie came out....
    "We've reached a point where natural selection doesn't have a chance in hell of keeping up with the procreation of imbeciles." -- RSGSRT

    Why is it acceptable for you to be an idiot, but not acceptable for me to point it out?

  2. #52
    Forum Member

    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Quote Originally Posted by DeltaAlpha4 View Post
    Would you like a girl's point of view? She found someone else in college. Sorry but its true.
    I agree with this also. That is not to say that she cheated on you or even that she is now with this person. Perhaps she just became interested in someone and that was enough to convince her to keep her options open. And perhaps she really didn't have anyone particular in mind, but just began to think about the sea of possibilities out there - especially when you are in college.

    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialBlend View Post
    Here is my take. You seem focused on changing to win her back. Let's say you do get her back. Most likely you will fall into that cycle again. The reason I say that is because when I first started my relationship with my significant other, I was smothering, jealous, etc. I was just like you. If she didn't text back or call back within a few hours I would start texting her friends and asking them where she was. Yes, I was THAT BAD.

    My signifcant other sat down and talked with me and said I have to change. I tried to but I could feel those tendencies coming back even stronger. Then I had a pep talk with myself and said that I NEEDED TO CHANGE. Not for her, but for myself. I wanted to better myself. This was around the same time that I lost 40 lbs, with the help of my significant other. If I look back at how I was, I get disgusted with myself and ****ed at myself for acting like that.

    As for weight, that's still a work in progress. I went down to 155, started putting on muscle (as well as some extra weight...) and went back to 171. Doing P90X now and dropping the weight again.

    My point is, do not change and become better to impress her or to "win" her back. Change and better yourself because you want to. That's the only way it will work. Cause if you change to win her back, what happens if you two get back together? The incentive keep bettering yourself and stay your changed self will slowly dissapate away
    Well put. I've been there myself (15+ years ago) and agree 100%

    Quote Originally Posted by Sierra259 View Post
    I recognize that I'm young and not nearly as mature as many who have replied. I bet in 10 years I'm not even going to remember any of this stuff that is so important to me now, just like I can't fathom why stuff was a big deal to me 10 years ago from today.
    You will remember it, but (hopefully) you will have a completely different perspective on it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeff22 View Post
    Plus, if you're in your early 20s, you'll be changing a lot and so will she, and odds are that you'll be moving in different directions. Nobody in that situation wants to believe that, but that's the truth.
    Very true. And there's no way I would have believed it in my early 20s.
    Some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them.

  3. #53
    Forum Member

    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    hey sierra, I have had a similar situation going on also...... am in my 20s and even went to school in HI...

    you have to give her some space. I have the hardest time trying to not talk to my gf and not text her constantly. maybe she just wants some freedom and space. You can't make her love you again by just wishing she loved you. She has to make the decision for herself and it may take time to see what she wants. If you want her to miss you, you have to give her the chance to. Constant texts and things of that nature will not help anything but will make you look clingy and will push her away!

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