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  1. #76
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    I do not think a 16 year old has any right to have sex while he/she is still under parental control. If they are married I suppose they become their own legal guardian. Mommy and Daddy have to pay for the offspring of any such couplings between un married minors.
    Just pay your dues, and be quiet :-)

  2. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by PlateStacker View Post
    Why would the stepdad have to be informed of her private relationship status? Did the kid forget to sign his name on the Sign-In sheet when he came in the house with her?

    If this stepdad absolutely felt the need to intrude on this girls privacy inside her own room with the door shut, a simple knock on the door asking if everything was ok would of made sense..
    It would matter if he walked in to a room in a house that he owns, or a least pays rent for, and sees a naked male, whom he has never seen in his life, on top of his step-daughter. The only problem I have with this scenerio is that he left and then came back later.

    And let me tell you something as well. I don't need permission to open the door to my daughter's room at any time, especially if I hear noises coming from that room. People think that kids automatically deserve privacy simply because they have a bedroom that they can shut the door on. That's not the case. I guess another solution to the problem would be taking the door off the hinges.

  3. #78
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    If this happened at my house, there wouldn't be much of a story. Just some blip about a missing 18 year old guy that nobody seems to know where he went......
    Quote Originally Posted by kontemplerande View Post
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  4. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76 View Post
    I don't lose any "rights" in my home regardless of the age of the child living here. If the child wants his/her "rights" they can go out and get a house of their own and support themselves. Rights? Good Lord.
    Exactly.

  5. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by PlateStacker View Post
    I completely agree with you on that.
    But like I said, at 16 she's is a Junior in HighSchool and drives a car. She's not a little pubescent 8 year old girl that needs constant monitoring from mommy and daddy, especially in her own house, in her room, with the door shut. Like I said, if the stepdad felt he absolutely had to intrude on her privacy, he could of simply knocked on the door like any normal human being would of done. The step daughter at least deserves that much respect, it works both ways.

    And as far as shooting the pipe layer... totally 100% uncalled for in any shape or form. There is a 0% chance of the stepdad actually thinking she is getting raped or killed.. there's just no way.
    See that's where you are wrong. It's not her house, or her room. It's parents house, parents room, parents door, parents everything. 16 or 8 doesn't matter.

    I can see justification for the shooting if the did didn't know he was her "boyfriend" and he believed truly that she was being raped.

  6. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by PlateStacker View Post
    I completely agree with you on that.
    But like I said, at 16 she's is a Junior in HighSchool and drives a car. She's not a little pubescent 8 year old girl that needs constant monitoring from mommy and daddy, especially in her own house, in her room, with the door shut. Like I said, if the stepdad felt he absolutely had to intrude on her privacy, he could of simply knocked on the door like any normal human being would of done. The step daughter at least deserves that much respect, it works both ways.

    And as far as shooting the pipe layer... totally 100% uncalled for in any shape or form. There is a 0% chance of the stepdad actually thinking she is getting raped or killed.. there's just no way.
    Have you ever been raped? Have you ever caught someone in the act of raping another? I'm assuming the ignorance of yours (and Feanors) comes from believing rape must appear violent or involve a weapon. If you two are able to glance at a sexual act and determine if it is or isn't by consent, I'm sure many police departments could benefit from your skills.


    The fact that it WOULD be normal for a parent (especially a male) to knock on the door of a 16 year old female child, actually speaks more to support his claim than to negate it. Something must have made him go in there.
    Truth is, there is no evidence your version is correct and apparently the court is coming down squarely on the side of the father...which, again, means there are most likely facts NOT available to the general public.

    Oh, and btw, my children as teenagers require more supervision than an 8 year old child. It's just a different type.


    I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

  7. #82
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    Looking at the blog post from the link a couple of pages back, the boyfriied was an individual who the parent knew of, but hadn't met. And what they knew of him must not have been good because she'd been forbidden to see him (Yes we all know that 16 year 0ld girls, when forbi=dden to do ANYthing, instantly stop doing/seeing the thing/individual. Uhhhh-huh. Sure)

    The blog post also noted that the young lady was...er...on top when the act was discovered.

    This leads me to believe that there was no way at all he could have decided she was being raped, and that he quite possibly recognized the guy. I think this was a rage-induced shooting, and that the daughter most likely knew exactly what dad was going for when he left the room.

    The blog also noted that the kids were scrambling to get dressed when he returned with the gun, and that the boy 'had his hands raised and was begging Dad 'not to shoot'

    The injuries were all apparently to the boys buttocks and legs. Seems he was trying to (Rapidly's my bet) vacate the premises when dad opened fire. I think the father should have been charged with and convicted of something. The laws that allow a homeowner to protect his and his family's lives are there to do just that...deadly force to protect his daughter's honor, when she having consensual sex with her boyfriend just doesn't and shouldn't cut it.

    THAT being said, I don't have kids, but do have a niece who is almost like a daughter to me, and when she was a teen I would NOT have reacted well to finding some dude having sex with her. As a few people have noted 'it would have been a bad day for him.

    I well remember asking a young man who was climbing the stairs to her room (And who told me that he was going to her room) if he knew what Med-flight (Local med-evac bird) was. When he answered that he did i asked:

    "Have ya ever ridden in it?"

    "No Sir"

    (Insert Evil expression and tone of voice) "Do ya WANT to?????"

    He got the message.

  8. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by maddogg123 View Post
    i guess another solution to the problem would be taking the door off the hinges.
    btdt


    I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

  9. #84
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe Mama View Post
    That is beyond premeditated if you ask me. He saw the act taking place, closed the door and left long enough to retrieve a weapon then shot him as he was on his way out of the house? Did I miss something here?
    +1. my first thoughts as well. His daughter was getting raped/killed so he closes the door, grabs a gun, loads it, re-opens the door as the kids hauling *** outa there and shoots him in the back. Yeahhhh...dont think that would even fly here.
    Quote Originally Posted by crass cop View Post
    Just do it in front of a camera and try not to get a boner and you shoudl be fine.

  10. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by PlateStacker View Post
    Why would the stepdad have to be informed of her private relationship status? Did the kid forget to sign his name on the Sign-In sheet when he came in the house with her?

    If this stepdad absolutely felt the need to intrude on this girls privacy inside her own room with the door shut, a simple knock on the door asking if everything was ok would of made sense..

    Spoken like a true NOT a parent. Go stack plates...
    Quote Originally Posted by crass cop View Post
    Just do it in front of a camera and try not to get a boner and you shoudl be fine.

  11. #86
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    Can't one of you legal hounds pull up the court ruling so we can get more reliable info?

  12. #87
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    It's a situation no parent wants to be in. Fathers want to protect their "little girl". This 16 year old is not the same girl that baked him cookies on a betty Crocker over. So he has to realize that she is growing up.

    imagine being a father and hearing noises coming from your daughters room. She is up there with a boy. The noises sound like they are lovemaking noises. What do you do?

    knock on the door and you get "JUST A MINUTE". tHERE IS ZERO REASON FOR A 16 YEAR OLD GIRL TO HAVE A BOY IN HER LOCKED BEDROOM.

    If you open it and see her having sex with the wonderful boy you hoped she'd marry, what is your reaction?

    Do you have the same reaction if she is on top of the criminal the police arrested last month. It is YOU that does not understand. He's a great guy just misunderstood by everyone .

    What do you do?

    now change it around you are the father of the boy caught. What is your reaction to having a parent harm your son for doing a consensual act? What is your reaction to being confronted by the girls father? "Your son and my daughter were caught having sex"

  13. #88
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    Deleted...
    Last edited by jd08; 09-30-2013 at 04:13 PM.

  14. #89
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    hat being said, I'm curious as to how her dating life is gonna go from now on.
    Yep, she will be now known as the girl with a volatile dad who has a gun.
    Life is what you make of it

  15. #90
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    According to the news reports, the kid surrendered and tried to leave. Dad was understandably mad, but he shot a kid who was fleeing in the arse, trying to nail his testicles.

    Sounds like it was consensual...the kid should have been taught never to come back and the girl should have been grounded for forever and given a lecture on the consequences of what she was doing.

    I doubt many men here at age 18 would have turned a girl down if she invited them over...me included. Kid was just being an 18 year old kid.

    ETA: That being said...if I walk in and find my daughter being raped- kid wouldn't have any balls left.
    Last edited by anachranerd; 04-22-2011 at 04:20 PM.
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  16. #91
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    When I said there was a problem with parenting, I meant the fact she's allowed in a room with the door closed with a boy 18 years old. How many of you would be allowed to do that in your younger days or just in general assuming you were raised by good parents who looked out for you? They're not going to be in there playing video games. Any normal parent would know what goes on behind closed doors with the opposite sex. You can't really say the step father was strict or looking out for her, beccause if he were, she wouldn't be in a room with a closed door with her boyfriend!

    Any normal parent would have beat the hell out of the kid so bad he'd be in the hospital for weeks. Maybe months... Not go get a gun. Sounds like nothing but jealousy. I heard a story once where a guy told his daughter he would kill her fiance if she married him. The day she got married, he came to the wedding and shot the guy. Reason? He was secretly in love with his daughter and couldn't stand seeing any guys with her. This could apply here since the guy sounds like a nutcase going to get a gun after witnessing it and not stopping it.
    Been chatting to a girl online. She's funny, sexy and flirty. Now she tells me she is an undercover cop! How cool is that at her age!?

  17. #92
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maddogg123 View Post
    I guess another solution to the problem would be taking the door off the hinges.
    LOL I did just that about 3 months ago, My daughter went to her room locked the door and thought she was going to be smart. The surprise on her face when it and the hinges came off!

    I can't believe the ones on here talking about kids rights in a parents home. My kids have no rights in my home other then breathing, eating, bathing, bring home above c average, saying yes sir, no sir, yes mama and no mama. There could be a few more rights in there somewhere but I haven't got around to writing up their bill of rights so I make it up as I go and how ever the situation dictates.
    If they don't like that at 18 by all means don't let the door hit ya in the back side on the way out!
    To harsh?
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  18. #93
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    LOL... not too harsh at all.

    I've got a little boy and another baby on the way. I won't hesitate to take the door off.

  19. #94
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    Some of you are stuck on age. 16.. 18.. thats only two years. It really all depends on how mature the girl is I suppose. I was always ahead of my age maturity wise, so I've always been respected by my parents. I know it's the parents house and all.. I get that. It's just a respect thing, a privacy thing.. has nothing to with what year she was born. I don't think it's asking too much to knock on the door and not barge in... just in case she might be doing something PRIVATE. Now, we don't know the whole story. Maybe this girl isn't a mature responsible teenager, and doesn't deserve the privacy, who knows.

  20. #95
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    When you have children, come back and let me know about your child's privacy.

    I have a 14 YO daughter and a 14 YO son. There is nothing sneakier than a teenage girl...or if it is, I haven't met it yet.

    FromOhio, regarding your statement about parenting. It's quite possible they didn't know he was there, especially given the reaction of the parent. Being that the parents claimed to know about him, but never had met him, I'm guessing he didn't come in via the front door or arrived prior her father [parents] being there. Again, NOTHING is sneakier than a teenage girl and that's from the POV of one that was one. My job as a parent is to stay one step ahead of both of my teenagers (and a third one on their heels). They will get something past me...it's going t o happen...then the punishment needs to be severe enough that that particular action won't be repeated...rest assured, it only begets a more creative way to get by the 'rules.' Do I have mature responsible teenagers? eh. I have hormones with feet running around here. They get great grades, they do their chores and they yes, ma'am, no ma'am...but THEY ARE TEENAGERS. They will bend the rules and they will suffer the consequences. They will be responsibles adults if we have to drag them there kicking the entire way.


    I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

  21. #96
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    just in case she might be doing something PRIVATE
    If she is doing something private that does not involve anyone else then she should use the bathroom or perform her private actions when the household is asleep.
    Life is what you make of it

  22. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76 View Post
    When you have children, come back and let me know about your child's privacy.

    I have a 14 YO daughter and a 14 YO son. There is nothing sneakier than a teenage girl...or if it is, I haven't met it yet.

    FromOhio, regarding your statement about parenting. It's quite possible they didn't know he was there, especially given the reaction of the parent. Being that the parents claimed to know about him, but never had met him, I'm guessing he didn't come in via the front door or arrived prior her father [parents] being there. Again, NOTHING is sneakier than a teenage girl and that's from the POV of one that was one. My job as a parent is to stay one step ahead of both of my teenagers (and a third one on their heels). They will get something past me...it's going t o happen...then the punishment needs to be severe enough that that particular action won't be repeated...rest assured, it only begets a more creative way to get by the 'rules.' Do I have mature responsible teenagers? eh. I have hormones with feet running around here. They get great grades, they do their chores and they yes, ma'am, no ma'am...but THEY ARE TEENAGERS. They will bend the rules and they will suffer the consequences. They will be responsibles adults if we have to drag them there kicking the entire way.
    +10000000

    Not much more can be added to that. Well put.

    Like Smurfette has said, I will do all I can to love my kids and help them be responsible adults. Help them in their chooses in life as they start out. At some point it will be on them to pick up the ball and run with what I have in good faith gave them. I will hope in the end I will have did a job well done.

    How ever as long as they live in my house I will always know what they are doing and what they have in their rooms. Guess what say little sweet heart is 25 years old living with mommy and daddy still and he is smoking weed doing drugs. He gets busted guess who else will pay for that one?

    If they are 18 and not married yet want to bump uglies with boy friends or girl friends they can rent a room.
    Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless - like water.

  23. #98
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    I think it's a total disrespect for the parent's home. I would never do that in my parent's home. If you want to play adult, then be an adult in your own house where you don't have to answer to anyone.

  24. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76 View Post
    When you have children, come back and let me know about your child's privacy.

    I have a 14 YO daughter and a 14 YO son. There is nothing sneakier than a teenage girl...or if it is, I haven't met it yet.

    FromOhio, regarding your statement about parenting. It's quite possible they didn't know he was there, especially given the reaction of the parent. Being that the parents claimed to know about him, but never had met him, I'm guessing he didn't come in via the front door or arrived prior her father [parents] being there. Again, NOTHING is sneakier than a teenage girl and that's from the POV of one that was one. My job as a parent is to stay one step ahead of both of my teenagers (and a third one on their heels). They will get something past me...it's going t o happen...then the punishment needs to be severe enough that that particular action won't be repeated...rest assured, it only begets a more creative way to get by the 'rules.' Do I have mature responsible teenagers? eh. I have hormones with feet running around here. They get great grades, they do their chores and they yes, ma'am, no ma'am...but THEY ARE TEENAGERS. They will bend the rules and they will suffer the consequences. They will be responsibles adults if we have to drag them there kicking the entire way.
    Amen to that Smurfette!

    As much as I don't agree with step father's reaction, but for those guys who think he has violated her privacy, please let me know how you would react when you see a man/men mounted on your daughter in your household.

  25. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76 View Post
    Have you ever been raped? Have you ever caught someone in the act of raping another? I'm assuming the ignorance of yours (and Feanors) comes from believing rape must appear violent or involve a weapon. If you two are able to glance at a sexual act and determine if it is or isn't by consent, I'm sure many police departments could benefit from your skills.
    Well with the exception of some really kinky $#!+ I can tell it's not rape based on the process of elimination and my ability to recognize consensual sex. Have you ever had sex? Well if you have you will know that the look on someone's face is a pretty good indicator of whether or not they are enjoying themselves. That isn't a Law Enforcement skill, BTW.

    If the rape was not at all violent or did not involve a weapon then the shooting was not justified because there was no imminent danger of death or serious bodily harm.

    Besides, in the father's own words, the first thing he thought was that they were having sex. Then he decided "oh I better mention rape or assault too so I can get out of this".

    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76
    The fact that it WOULD be normal for a parent (especially a male) to knock on the door of a 16 year old female child, actually speaks more to support his claim than to negate it. Something must have made him go in there.
    Exactly, what made him go in there is anger. Just like all the fathers/uncles/etc who have posted in this thread he was ****ed off that someone was touching HIS daughter in HIS house and they were disobeying HIS rules so he was going to go in there and show them what's what.

    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette_76
    Truth is, there is no evidence your version is correct and apparently the court is coming down squarely on the side of the father...which, again, means there are most likely facts NOT available to the general public.
    Or it means that the judge was sympathetic just like many of the posters in this thread have been.
    Last edited by Fëanor; 04-22-2011 at 11:26 PM.

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