When to call the police on my soon-to-be-stepdad [Archive] - Police Forums & Law Enforcement Forums @ Officer.com

View Full Version : When to call the police on my soon-to-be-stepdad

COPS

01-03-2007, 07:32 AM

My soon to be stepfather got out of San Quenton prison today for parol violations (he beat a highway patrol cop near to death) aftering being there for 4 months for threatning to kill my father. He always gets drunk and yells, threatens, breaks stuff, throws things, etc. So since he is fresh of out prison at what point am I able to call the police and they actually be able ot do something? I can't take the everyday yelling and threats so the sooner he goes back to prison where he belongs, the better. But if he just gets drunk and yells a lot at 4pm, can I call the police and have them be able to do something? What if he breaks something? etc. Any help is great, thanks.

FLPD698

01-03-2007, 09:41 AM

SOCALCOP

01-03-2007, 09:54 AM

My first advice to you is move out! If you can, otherwise if an emergency situatiuon does arise call 911, without him knowing you called would be better by the sound of his violent temper. Sounds like he could be violent towrds you too. Stay out of his way if you have to live with him but also try and have a confidential meet with his parole officer to tell him your concerns. He may give you his number and ask that you call if something comes up so he can someday show up for an "unanounced visit."

just joe

01-03-2007, 11:00 AM

Are you a juvenile or adult? Can you go live with your father? It sounds like your mother has issues of her own, so the sooner you can get out the better off you will be.

COPS

01-03-2007, 08:25 PM

Domestics happen at anytime of the day. Any violation of his parole including drinking alcohol will get him back to the big house. The other thing that I would recommend is getting him legally evicted and filling for a restraining order. Get him as far away from your place of domicile as possible.
The thing is my mom thinks she can improve him and make him a better person. I'm 19 and I could put the guy down if I want, but if I hurt him my mom would never forgive me. He hasn't hit anyone in my family yet that I know about, he just makes my mom and sister cry daily because of his actions and it ****es me off to no end. So since he is on parole does it mean once he gets drunk he is violating his parole? If so that is great news because he drinks about 7~9 beers a day, everyday.

sgttom

01-04-2007, 08:14 AM

learn his parole officers name / telephone number. he/she can advise you of the terms of parole (usually will say no drugs, no alcohol, etc.). talk to them for frequent visits - unannounced.

call the police for any problems, get it documented. tell the police he's on parole. call the PO after to advise of the parole violation. the pd can file a EPO (emergency protective order) that'll kick him out and serves as a (very) temporary stay away order. you'll / your mom will have to go to court within a short time period to have it formalized and extended.

move out if you can or while there and getting bad, get out and call.

your dad, the person whom the step threatened to kill, needs to follow up with the DA's office for the charges on that.

good luck

Frank Booth

01-04-2007, 10:34 AM

COPS

01-04-2007, 05:08 PM

You're 19, move out. It's not your house and if your mom wants him there, he's her problem, not yours. Join the military if you want to, or the Peace Corps or something if you can't come up with any other options, but leave.
I agree my mom has made her bed thinking she can make him change and they will have a wonderful life together, I would leave if it weren't for my sister
. My sister hates him too but she doesnt have a steady enough job and money to leave someplace else. The charges on the death threats to my dad were dropped by him and now he is all medicated up in a old folks home because he nearly drank himself into a coma.

3India

01-05-2007, 10:35 AM

Maybe, this is far fetched, if you and your Sis get along well enough and she has a job at all, you two could room-mate(sp?) until she comes to her senses and gets steady enough to be on her own. Is this guy close to being a 3 timer? I would hate for your family to be hurt by some con who has nothing to lose by taking someone out before he goes back for life (does CA still have the "three strikes" law?). ALWAYS watch your back around the guy, cons tend to be sneaky when they attack, and drunks can be very unpredictable. Stay safe I would definitely follow the advice given by Sgt Tom.

Frank Booth

01-05-2007, 11:27 AM

How old is your sister?

COPS

01-05-2007, 02:58 PM

How old is your sister?
17 soon 18.

landonjensen

01-06-2007, 03:29 AM

yes, the last i heard that the 3 strikes law is still in affect. :)

Maybe, this is far fetched, if you and your Sis get along well enough and she has a job at all, you two could room-mate(sp?) until she comes to her senses and gets steady enough to be on her own. Is this guy close to being a 3 timer? I would hate for your family to be hurt by some con who has nothing to lose by taking someone out before he goes back for life (does CA still have the "three strikes" law?). ALWAYS watch your back around the guy, cons tend to be sneaky when they attack, and drunks can be very unpredictable. Stay safe I would definitely follow the advice given by Sgt Tom.

t150vsuptpr

01-06-2007, 04:21 PM

Your sister doesn't have to wait to turn 18 if she goes before a court and is emancipated.

Lots of great advice above, the guy is trouble. Mother is safer if he's "inside" the walls, but she'll not be able to understand that. Never turn your back on him, and keeping sis safe for now is your priority for now, the idea of y'all striking out together for now is not a bad one.

Sucks to be in a siitustion like that, but it's one not of your making and you can't fix it all.

Take care.......... :)