View Full Version : Nicknames ..appropriate or otherwise.........

05-09-2001, 04:00 PM
The police service never fails to tag individuals according to characteristics or events. What appropriate or inappropriate nicknames have you come across? Here are two of the local characters in my home force:

Broken Arrow.... named because this officer wouldn't work and cannot be fired!!

Thrush.... this Traffic Sergeant according to fellow officers is an irritating c**t.

05-09-2001, 06:08 PM
Here's mine at least...

Deputy Dewey: Look like David Arquette from Scream

Deputy Doofus: Guess I act kinda unusual sometimes...

brooklyn dave
05-09-2001, 06:22 PM
Crash- wiped out 3 radio car's- non emergency driving- too much vodka

Kiss of Death: we would set a golf date on that day he would say it's gonna rain and it did

Joe bitfzk; Parked his new ride on a pier- it went in.

Lone Ranger- tied his police horse on the pier, the horse went in

Proud Mary: fell in love with every cop she went out with- sh's also a cop

05-09-2001, 06:28 PM
Slug: Just like it's animal namesake, this officer just sits there, does little, and eats off the efforts of others.

ROD: Retired On Duty; technically still working, but he/she might as well retire, based upon the level of (in)active police work. Somewhat similar to slug.

Tackleberry: Like the namesake character from the "Police Academy" comedy movies, extremely heavy handed tactics, carries far more firepower than necessary, but very loyal to his fellow police officers.

Barney Fife: Another namesake character taken from Hollywood (this time, from the "Andy Griffith" TV Show), a bit of a "doofus" (see the above post) to the point where his Sheriff (Andy Griffith) will only allow him ONE bullet, which he keeps in his shirt pocket. Unlike Tackleberry, being called a "Barney Fife" cannot be construed as a compliment under any circumstances.

Snake: Generally reserved for management types and management wannabees. Refers to being slimy, slithering through the grass to pounce on unsuspecting prey (fellow police officers). Also see weasel.

05-09-2001, 06:45 PM
I have the nickname "CRASH" cause I ran my car into the brand new garage door we had for like 3 days. http://www.officer.com/ubb/smile.gif

05-09-2001, 06:47 PM
Blue hair: a gramma or grampa driving

Bucket of coal: very derogatory name for a car full of blacks (Talk about racial profiling!!) http://www.officer.com/ubb/frown.gif Please don't use it!!

Road pizza . . .

Felony stupidity

or . . .

Felonious name-calling

Pea-shooter (or is that a military term?)

Desk jockey (That's me!!)

Armchair quarterback (someone who wasn't there giving opinions) Also wheelchair general, Monday morning quarterback

But I stray from police nicknames. I would, to continue this thread, like to know what nicknames police call each other. I already heard on another thread a state trooper calling Don a poopy shirt although I can't see how that particular state trooper could know about Don's personal hygiene.

This is actually for a story I'm writing.
PLEASE: what do state troopers call local municipal police -- in a derogatory sense? Since I'm no longer one, nothing you say will offend me!! I actually need this information. If you don't give it to me, I'll start calling you at home!! Then I'll start calling at 3am!! http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Any other names??

Poopy shirt.


05-09-2001, 06:49 PM
"Moocher Al" for obvious reasons. Had once worked LAPD. If we were on a prisoner transport to the LA area would drive clear across the basin to get to an

05-09-2001, 06:59 PM
I like this thread!

A family confided to me yesterday that all 3 officers of my (former) department had nicknames:

Officer Humble
Officer Arrogant
Chief Zoom http://www.officer.com/ubb/confused.gif but I drive SLOW! http://www.officer.com/ubb/confused.gif

Chris Zoo . . . . Chris

05-09-2001, 07:00 PM
"Clam Dude" deputy whose last name was Oyster.

**Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.**
6P1 (retired)

05-09-2001, 07:15 PM
Gunky-I got that in the military after a couple nights on the town.

"Never try to teach a pig to sing...it wastes your time and it annoys the pig."

Jim Burnes
05-09-2001, 07:20 PM
I was called Rocket Man, from an incident in 1973, in Germany, wherein I rousted into formation an entire Combat Engineer company, at about 0300 hours, because someone had broken out my car window with a bottle rocket.

(A funny story all by itself!) The name stuck.

Jim Burnes

Jim Burnes
05-09-2001, 07:23 PM
OH, and remember kids: Never order an entire Combat Engineer company into formation at 0300 hours!

Results can be traumatic.


Jim Burnes

05-09-2001, 07:57 PM
ASPIRIN = slow working dope

05-09-2001, 08:01 PM
Hmmm, a trip down Memory Lane....

Lessee, there's Schultz, Klink, Little Adolf, Il Duce, Nazi, Fascist, Commando, Sarge, chuckles, and stuffed shirt, to pick some of the nicer ones. My current favorite however, is ...... Mr. Warmth


05-09-2001, 08:52 PM
UPS Man: Ultimate Patrol Supervisor, thinks he's God's gift....

05-10-2001, 12:36 AM
My senior year in high school I was dubbed with the nickname "Dead Boy". The summer after junior year, I went to TN to stay with my father. Some people who didn't know this, asked my younger brother where I was...he told them I'd been killed in a car wreck. The word spread.

The first day of school, there were some SHOCKED expressions on some faces... "DUDE!! I thought you were DEAD!!!" Hence the nickname...Dead Boy. I thought it was hilarious, my mom was ****ED!!

Nicknames of some officers at my agency:

"Mike LLLLOWRY" (From that movie with Martin Lawrence)
"The Colonel" (thinks he's the commanding officer)
"Flash"(never lost a foot pursuit)
"Stoli"(named after a local watering hole, which was named after that famous vodka)
"Jessup" (his home town in Georgia)
"Skeletor" (from the He-Man cartoon)
"Skizzy" (from the name Scotty)
"Soup" short for "Super Dave" (Yep his name's David)
"Corky" (I don't know)
"Loggerhead" (Gigantic cranium)
"Dumpster D*ck" aka "D.D" (Yes, he'll put it anywhere)
"Mo" (short for last name Morrison)
"Snapper" (always briskly releases mike button after transmission)
"Waterpump" (called out EOD once for a suspected explosive device...guess what it was?)
"Fat Rat" (not really fat, not really a rat, but it stuck)
"Misdemeanor Mike" (a dog handler that'll make an arrest for a seed and a stem)
"Latino Heat" (our Hispanic liaison officer)
"Fluff" (named for his hairdo)

Also, several officers' names have simply been shortened to letters or syllables, including "G", "Z", "SKI", "J.W." and the Sheriff himself "P.J."

That was fun! http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

No cops, know anarchy.

"He aint finna come all up in my house and act a fool and be gettin away with it cause I will go smooth off." -Movista

05-10-2001, 01:42 AM
Snake....and it would be inappropriate to tell why on here. http://www.officer.com/ubb/smile.gif

Perseverate In Pugna

05-10-2001, 02:19 AM
Billbo (as in the Hobbit, but 6'4")
Mr. Sunshine (Not!)
Yul (Bald)(Me)
Mongo (Big and acted the part)
Sluggo (Every Dept. has one)
Postal (Easily provoked)
Onionhead (long story)
Rainman (Sort of a savant - knew everything)
Weasel (Never met an overtime slip he didn't like)
Goose (Fell off bike when goosing a buddy)
Grampa (Ooold)
Copasaurus (Almost as ooold)
Chachi (Plays the part)
Gordo (Gangbangers gave the name)
Clem (looked like a Clem Cadiddlehopper)
Biff (Just fits him)
Gump (A tad slow on the uptake)
Dude (Calls everyone dude, thus...)
Hollywood (Just like he sounds)
Tweaker (Skinny, real high energy, works dope)
Elvis aka Buttercup (Sideburns)(Yellow VW Bug)

Lots more...

[This message has been edited by vbrenner (edited 05-10-2001).]

05-10-2001, 02:25 AM
I too like this thread.

Let's see someone else said shultz from a old war show i believe? My grandpa used to call me shultz but only because i was fat and bald as a baby.
I got chunk because i was the largest kid at home.
Now that i want to become a cop i get;
Piglet, screw, and bacon. my uncle calls me by the name of some guy that played on that show Hawaii 5-0, I can't remember the name, because alot he says gos in one ear and out the other http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

05-10-2001, 02:58 AM
The officers at the dept. where I intern have given me the nickname "detective" - can't quite figure out why...

05-10-2001, 03:56 AM
Donk - From Crocodile Dundee 1. You know the big guy in the Australian bar? That's me. Maybe I have a few more teeth. http://www.officer.com/ubb/wink.gif

05-10-2001, 04:59 AM
Some interesting postings....lol.......... here are a few more:

Tasty... a young civillian employee said of this detective ' ooh, he is tasty ' this went to the 'tecs head and even refers to himself by his nickname.

Oner... so named because he has one ear larger than the other.

Flash... this officer (no longer in the job)
had been suspected of flashing at schoolgirls, whilst waiting a discipline hearing and still at work this male would respond to this name.

Woody Allens Sister... a female civillian, not the best looker, such a fan of the CID band that they named themselves after her. It was 12 months before she found out!

Sloath... not the quickest guy.

Donkey... for obvious reasons.

05-10-2001, 11:09 AM
Some of the officers have been known to call me 'captain chaos' when I go out on patrol, due to the fact some huge fight generally occurs when I am on duty and I am the first to get stuck in and also come out on top with a prisoner.

Whats more, this nick is changed whenever i wear body armour to 'captain cautious'.

05-10-2001, 11:52 AM
- E-Jack (his initials are E.J.)
- The Spook (nice guy, quiet, shock of white hair, always snapping pictures)
- Wonder (because you wonder what he's gone and gotten himself into now)

05-10-2001, 12:24 PM
DD-Dumpster Diver...yep he goes fishing for the goodies in a dumpster.

The General...our Division Commander who thinks he rules the world.

Spacecraft...last name is Craft. He tends to "zone" out from time to time.

Momma Bordelon...because the mrs. always made smiley faces with the mustard on his sandwhichs for lunch.

Without the support of our fellow officers, sometimes we have no support at all.

05-10-2001, 02:03 PM
"Tambo" for a female NPS Ranger named Tammy who thought she was Rambo!

"MacIver" for an NPS Ranger because he could fix darn near anything, and always seemed to have the right answer.

"Dangerous Dan" for a back country NPS Ranger who took a few too many chances.

"The Lone Waynger" for another back country NPS Ranger whose first name was Wayne.

"I'm just a "senior teen-ager!"
6P1 (retired)

05-10-2001, 02:20 PM
We've got a "Captain Chaos", too, but it's for a different reason.

"Never try to teach a pig to sing...it wastes your time and it annoys the pig."

05-10-2001, 04:33 PM
oh man what a funny thread...
wellll...we (females) here in Jersey call the state troopers "strutt-n-fluff" for obvious reasons. we also comment that we wonder if most of their mothers know they're out so late (when they're patrolling at night). in other words they're very young!

memories of a couple of my ex-husbands (municipal) police force's nicknames:
Housecat...a large, lazy dispatcher
Krazy Krough (his last name)...and he WAS

the best i heard was given to a female citizen who...shall i say... liked to "assist" as many state cops as possible. she was called "The Blender." http://www.officer.com/ubb/eek.gif

05-10-2001, 04:35 PM
Archie - For a former coworker who was fired exposing himself while driving his lifted truck. The only way we figured the victims were able to see him was him "arching"

"Da Bomb" - A former supervisor sent an email to the commander,giving suggestions for a Defensive tactics instructor. He used that phrase describing me, a buddy saw it, and I'm still trying to live it down.

Fat Bastard - The supervisor above, taken from Austin Powers movies

The SS - a former sgt, who reveled in initiating IA's

Oompa Loompa - A very short patrol guy, from Charlie and the Chocolate factory

Backseat bail - use your imagination

Severe Vitas

05-10-2001, 04:37 PM
Buddingnovelist wrote: "PLEASE: what do state troopers call local municipal police -- in a derogatory sense? Since I'm no longer one, nothing you say will offend me!! I actually need this information."

Municipal PD Officers are: City Kiddies
Sheriff's Deputies are: County Mounties
State Troopers are just "troopers"

On to niknames...

"The Weasel": Derogatory. A supervisor with no backbone. He would back down and allow themselves to be manipulated by subordinates resulting in changing of work assignments to officers who would not b*tch. This meant that some folks always got the bad assignments, while the whiners got a free ride. Would also backdown from the administration and not support his troops. Would swear that he requested training, equipment, etc. and that admin said no...only to find out he never asked.

"The Crawfish": Derogatory. Similar to a weasel, but slightly different. A Crawfish may ordinarily be a good supervisor except when in a spot where it may be their ***** in a crack; at which time they "crawfish" on you and leave you hanging.

"Roscoe": Derogatory. As in Roscoe P. Coltrane from the Dukes of Hazard TV series. An officer who is ignorant and backwards, but very "energetic".

"MacGyver": Derogatory. An officer who keeps all sorts of tools and gadgets with him at all times, even off-duty. Does so to the point of being ridiculous.

"Indiana Jones": Complimentary. An officer who improvises well in a pinch.

"Gus": Derogatory, but may be used in a joking manner. As in "Gee Your Stupid". Military origin.

"Crash": Neutral. Used to describe officers with questionable driving ability.

"Speed Racer": Neutral. Used to describ officers who think the D on the gear shift indicater stands for Drag and the R stands for Race. This officer only knows two speeds: Stopped and Flat Out.

"Deadeye": Derogatory. Used sarcasticaly to refer to an officer with porr marksmanship skills.

"Boomer": Humorous. Universally reserved for officers who have had an Accidental Discharge with their Patrol Shotgun, often involving the roof of the squad room, or their squad car.

"Houdini": Derogatory. refers to an officer who canstantly loses his cuff key.

"Super Secret Squirrel": Derogatory. Refers to an officer who plays everything up as a Big Secret. Will pull you aside, check for electronic surveilance, swear you to secrecy, and then telling you the Big Secret which ends up being something trivial and asinine. Example: "And SSS thinks he is the only one who knows about the surveillance over on Stillwater."

"Toadie": Derogatory. Refers to an officer who sys on officers, and may often fabricate inforamation in order to provide same to a supervisor expecting favors. A Toadie is not respected by fellow officers and even less by the administrator for whom he is a toadie. Example: "Shhh. Here comes the Toadie.", or "Let me take my Toadie out to lunch and I'll see what the shifts are saying."

"Horse": Also "Rabbi". Neutral. Used to refer to an old head within a department who functions as a mentor to a junior officer.

"Dudley": As in "Dudley Do-Right" from the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show. Derogatory. An absurdly straight-up officer. Example: "Dudley went back on the way home to check on grandma."

"Warren": The guy who replaced Barney on Andy Griffth. Similar to a "Dudley". Derogatory. Example: "Don't pee your pants Warren. It's just a burglary call."

"Barnaby Jones": Neutral. From the TV series by the same name. Refers to an older and experienced investigator. Usually calm and understated.

"Columbo": Derogatory. From the TV series of the same name. The fictional character is usually held in high regard. The nickname is usually used derisively to refer to an officer or investigator who believes that they are crafty and intelligent, but who are not. Also "Kojak". Example: "And Columbo over here had the bright idea to try to dust the lawnmower for fingerprints."

"Starsky and Hutch": Derogatory. From the TV series of the same name. Refers to officers who think they are cool, but are not. Example: "Starsky and Hutch were out of service at the high school for over an hour."

"Doogie": Neutral. From Doogie Howser TV series where a boy genius becomes a medical doctor. Refers to a young officer who has been advacned further than most officers his age and therefore is much younger than his counterparts. May also refer to someone who is merely very young looking. Example: "Hey Doogie, what is a 'hard drive'?"

"Homer": Derogatory. From the TV series the Simpsons. Refers to an officer who thinks he has great ideas, but is actually one step behind everyone else. Example: "Hey why don't we watch the front of the bank too?"..."Because the SWAT team is alread over there, Homer."


05-12-2001, 09:58 AM
Taipan (deadly snake) - in the top pocket where the official notebook is

Tin arse - Lucky bastard

Tight Arse - miser - miserable bastard

Motor Mouth - never shuts up

Dickless Tracey - Ancient (sexist) term for female police officer - now sometimes given to wannabe detectve but hasn't got it female cop.

Crow eater - resident of South Australia

Sand groper - resident of Western Australia

Seppo - Yank

Pom - Pom

Blue - bloke with red hair

Buddha - large bloke

Zipper - guy with a lot of stitches.

Picnic - couple of sandwiches short of a ....

Dingo - low, snake in the grass type.

Wombat - sexually over-active male - you know the definition of a wombat "one who eats roots, shoots and leaves." (it all depends on the extra comma you place after "eats").

I could do this all day!!! http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

05-12-2001, 11:13 AM
Don't know how I got the Maverick streetname, the gangs in the projects just started calling me that, and it stuck for years. I'd like to think it was due to my resemblence to Tom Cruise. http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

On another beat the gangs started calling me T1000 after the evil cop-terminator in Terminator II.

[This message has been edited by Maverick (edited 05-12-2001).]

me again
05-12-2001, 03:12 PM
Webster -- My nickname in the Army (I guess because I was a book-smart dork)

Splash -- The nickname of an officer who, while checking a house-alarm at midnight, walked into a swimming pool & made a big splash.

05-12-2001, 03:17 PM
Originally posted by Sparky:
"Boomer": Humorous. Universally reserved for officers who have had an Accidental Discharge with their Patrol Shotgun, often involving the roof of the squad room, or their squad car.

Sparky, my Man!

Thank you for the City Kiddies. I can use that.

I noticed that you called Boomers a humorous nickname rather than derogatory. Made me wonder . . . http://www.officer.com/ubb/smile.gif

My nickname at Ft. Benning was Sergeant Rock. Never could figure that out.


[This message has been edited by Buddingnovelist (edited 05-12-2001).]

05-12-2001, 09:24 PM
G'day Sparkey

"Sparkey" - electrician

"Chippie" - carpenter

Cutlunch cowboy - Army reservist
Weekend Warrior - as above
Chockos - as above again

Pogo - desk jockey
Shiny arse - as above

Slug - well equipped male

Wacker - crazy bloke, idiot, nerdy

Wanker - wanker

Sook - wimp

Keith - dumb wanker

Piker - no guts, wuss (pronounced wooss)

Wuss - sook

Richard Cranium - dickhead

Dickhead - wanker

More to come if this topic keeps going! http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

05-13-2001, 02:40 AM
"I got the Maverick streetname, the gangs in the projects just started calling me that, and it stuck for years. I'd like to think it was due to my resemblence to Tom Cruise."

That sounds better than thinking they called you that because you resembled a broken down, rusty bucket of bolts http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Perseverate In Pugna

05-13-2001, 04:10 AM
Originally posted by Maverick:
I'd like to think it was due to my resemblence to Tom Cruise. http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Better'n a lost calf.

05-13-2001, 05:55 AM
My current is "The Phantom" Picked it up last year when I got transfered to a new squad. For the first three weeks I was either sick, on vacation, had to go to the motor garage, had to go to court, or something so I never made a briefing and never met anyone on the squad. When I finally showed up they started calling me The Phantom because they all knew I was on the radio and out there somewhere but nobody had ever seen me.

05-13-2001, 12:45 PM
Bud - standing for Big Ugly and Dumb.

AAA with a gun - Any highway patrol officer.

Deputy DooDah - Given to me by a security guard in Furnace Creek. Died when he left (thank GOD!)

Critter - Name given to himself by above security guard. IMHO was an insult to every "critter" in the area.

"I'm just a "senior teen-ager!"
6P1 (retired)

DMS 525
05-14-2001, 08:29 PM
My charges called me "Laser Lips" for a while, for the way I bent someone's ear over the radio one night(they imagined lightning shooting from my eyes, and laser beams shooting out of my mouth!)

That only lasted until a gal I dated many years ago pinned "Superchicken" on me(my first name is that of a well known superhero, and my last is like that of a cartoon chicken- only way she could remember my name).

I'm pretty good at pinning a nickname on someone that will stick. Some like them, and some don't(DILLIGAS?). http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

05-15-2001, 08:00 PM
Here are a few from our department......

TREETRUNK---as in he's as big and tall as

TANK--as in he's built like a

PONDSKIPPER--other than he likes to be out in
his boat when he's not working I have NO idea where that came from.

BLOCKER--A young Deputy who tries to make
sure that no one else even talks to any of the good looking girls.

Captain Broccolli--no it's not his favorite
vegi, it just sorta sounds like his last name.

Uncle Bill or Hunky Bill--one of our LT's, everyone calls him one or the other. He not even related to anyone around here and certainally no where near a hunk.

ETNA OR EGNA--our receptionist, EDNA

Hammy--last name is Hamilton

Durel for Darryl
Tomacina for Tommy
Otis for Chuck (as in OTIS my man)
Cheeze for Breeana

Sunshine or Hoochy Cooch (for our Sheriff)

And I'm Lt. Lungs (you figure it out) http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

05-15-2001, 11:53 PM
Originally posted by DMS 525:

Some like them, and some don't(DILLIGAS?). http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

I am SHOCKED! I thought this was the "kinder, gentler" DMS http://www.officer.com/ubb/confused.gif http://www.officer.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

"I'm just a "senior teen-ager!"
6P1 (retired)

05-16-2001, 07:17 AM
I thought someone on a thread once used this one ... MUPPET ... Most Useless Police Person Ever Trained.

I've also heard SQUIRREL COPS, FISH COPS, C.H.P.=Can't Handle Policework, and CHP=AAA with guns. (I don't necessarilly agree, I've just heard them)